While you may try to avoid conflict in the workplace, it can sometimes happen with customers or other employees. When this occurs, you will need to decide how to best handle the situation. Learning about conflict management and ways to deal with upset customers is especially important for employee success in customer service.
Conflict Management
Conflict management is designed to handle disagreements between two or more parties in a way that minimizes negative influences and encourages all parties to come to an agreement. When conflict management is successful, it results in an outcome that is beneficial to all parties involved and that all parties agree to.
It’s not common to have one go-to method for managing conflict that can be applied to every situation. People usually assess each conflict and scenario separately to figure out the best way to deal with it.
Here are some ways to judge a conflict and choose an appropriate conflict management strategy:
Questions to Ask Before Choosing a Conflict Management Style
1. How much do you value the person or issue?
Your assessment of the situation may be influenced by how much you value the person or issue in question. You may be less likely to continue a long-term conflict if you’re concerned about damaging your relationship with someone, but resolving the issue could also strengthen your relationship.
You can also tell how important the conflict is based on how close to home the issue is. Maybe it’s a question of your morals or personal values, in which case it may be essential for you to prolong the conflict. However, if the issue doesn’t matter much to you, it might be simpler to let it go.
2. Do you understand the consequences?
You should be prepared for whatever consequences may entail either entering or not partaking in the conflict. Especially in a professional environment, there could be serious consequences for continuing a conflict with a higher-up. If you are made aware of the potential risks, you can decide whether or not to prolong the conflict.
The consequences of not entering a conflict may be personal or moral. Maybe a wrong decision will be made because you didn’t bring in a conflicting perspective. Give yourself a clear overview of all the consequences, both positive and negative, beforehand.
3. Do you have the necessary time and energy to contribute?
Before starting a conflict, make sure you are prepared to dedicate the time necessary to research, present, and talk through the situation. Stress may be a long-term effect of the conflict.
It’s important to make sure you’re invested in the conflict before you try to resolve it. If you don’t care about the issue, you won’t be motivated to put in the work it’ll take to fix it. Arguing about something that doesn’t matter to you will just be draining.
The 5 conflict management styles
There is no one-size-fits-all solution to conflict. The trigger and parties involved will differ from situation to situation.
A manager who is good at resolving conflict should be able to step back and look at the conflict from a different perspective, and then use the conflict management style that would work best for that particular situation.
1. Accommodating
This style is all about giving the other party what they want instead of what you want. You let them have control and get their way.
If you don’t feel as strongly about an issue as the other person, it might be best to use accommodation. This option is about keeping the peace and not prolonging the conflict. Sometimes it’s worth knowing when to pick your battles.
Choosing to accommodate someone in a small conflict can be the best choice, even though it might seem weak. This style is cooperative, but can lead to resentment.
The upside to having small disagreements is that they can be handled quickly and easily, with very little effort. Managers can use this to their advantage by building a reputation as an easygoing person, and employees will know that they can speak up about problems without worry of reprisal.
The managers might be considered weak if they too often give in. On bigger or more important issues, this technique will not be productive and should be avoided.
Example:
In a marketing meeting, the colors for the new spring campaign are being discussed. Raymond is adamant that choice A is the best choice. Gina thinks that choice B is slightly better, but decides to let Raymond choose the colors, to avoid arguing about two choices that she thinks are both fine.
2. Avoiding
The main goal of this style is to avoid or reduce conflict by ignoring it, removing the people who are fighting, or avoiding the conflict altogether. This might mean that the people who are causing the conflict are taken off the project they are fighting about, deadlines are pushed back, or people are reassigned to different departments.
This conflict resolution style can be effective if a cool-down period would be helpful or if you need time to consider your stance on the conflict.
The benefits of giving people time to calm down before addressing a conflict is that it can often times lead to the issue resolving itself. Additionally, it shows trust on the part of the manager that the employees will be able to act like adults and figure out the issue.
The main disadvantage of this technique is that it can make conflicts worse if it’s used in the wrong situations. Managers can also appear incompetent to their employees if they avoid conflict too much, since it will appear as though they’re unable to handle disagreements.
Example:
Jake and Amy have been collaborating on the new UX design for weeks, but they are increasingly unable to agree on changes. The deadline is looming and they are both feeling the pressure.
The new deadline gives them both time to work on other projects and space to take a break from each other. This extra time and space allows them to cool down and resume working together in a more collaborative mindset.
3. Compromising
This style tries to find a compromise by asking both sides to give up some of what they want so that a solution can be reached.
This style of negotiation is sometimes referred to as ‘lose-lose’ because both sides will have to concede some ground in order to reach an agreement on the broader issue. This approach is often used when there is a time limit in place, or when a solution is needed urgently, rather than being concerned with achieving the perfect outcome.
If you use compromise too often as a way to resolve conflict, it can lead to resentment. Use it sparingly to avoid this.
The positive aspects of this situation are that problems can be fixed quickly, both sides will learn more about the other person’s point of view, and setting up a compromise can lead to future collaboration. Additionally, those in charge are seen as being helpful and working towards a resolution.
The drawbacks of this technique are that it rarely results in both parties feeling satisfied, and can often leave one side feeling as though they gave up too much and erode any goodwill the employees had towards their managers.
Example:
Rosa and Charles are responsible for the advertising budget for the next quarter. Rosa wants to replace some of the current ads with full-time social media posts, while Charles wants to increase the number of targeted digital ads.
A solution is found by hiring a social media person to work part-time, and the rest of the budget is spent on digital advertising.
4. Competing
This style is characterized by a refusal to compromise, and a refusal to give in to the viewpoints or wants of others.
One party is unwilling to compromise on their beliefs about the best way to handle a situation, and continues to insist on their original approach even when it is clear that it is not working.
This typically occurs in situations where adhering to a specific moral code is necessary, when there is no time to explore other options, or when an unpopular decision needs to be made. While this approach can quickly resolve disputes, it also carries a significant risk of reducing morale and productivity.
This is not a style that you should use often.
The main advantage of this management style is that it instills a sense of confidence in the manager and demonstrates to employees that the manager is unwilling to compromise their principles. Additionally, this style of management is effective in quickly resolving disputes as there is no room for debate or discussion.
The disadvantages of this management style are that managers will be perceived as inflexible and dictatorial. Resolving conflicts by quashing any opposing views will not result in contented, productive staff, nor will it usually result in discovering the most effective resolutions.
5. Collaboration
Reaching this style of success is often difficult and time-consuming, but it produces the best long-term results.
The needs and wants of all parties are considered, and a solution is found that leaves everyone satisfied. This usually involves everyone sitting down together to talk through the conflict and negotiate a solution.
Preserving relationships and/or finding solutions with significant impacts are vital.
The upside to this approach is that it results in a win-win situation for all parties involved. The Manager is seen as having successfully mediated the situation and conflict is resolved.
The main downside to this approach to conflict management is that it can be very time-consuming. This can lead to delays in deadlines or production, as solutions are sought. Depending on the parties involved, this process can take quite a while, and can result in losses.
Example:
Terry and Janet are having disagreements over the design of a new prototype. Terry wants to include a certain set of features while Janet wants to include a different set.
The discuss each feature of the problem and why it is important until they reach a solution that incorporates a mix of their features and some new ones they realized were important as they negotiated.
The lasting effects of conflicts on morale, productivity, and happiness depend on the tactics used to reach a solution. Minimizing the lasting effects of conflicts requires using the right tactic at the right time.
Conflict Management Personality Types
Damian Killen and Danica Murphy wrote a book called Introduction to Type® and Conflict, which explains the different conflict management styles associated with each of the 16 personality types in the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator® (MBTI®) assessment.
Their theory states that the last two letters of someone’s Type are the strongest indicators of their conflict management strategy. The third letter determines how you make decisions: by Thinking (T) or Feeling (F). The fourth letter determines how you approach the outside world: by Judging (J) or Perceiving (P).
Thinking vs. Feeling
People who tend to think things through typically understand the perspective of all sides, can come up with logical solutions, know what they believe and can tolerate others in the situation.
Individuals who tend to focus on feelings typically empathize with the interests of all parties, work to create solutions that allow for growth, and would prefer to change themselves rather than force others to change. These individuals also tend to focus on accepting and appreciating others who are present in the situation.
Judging vs. Perceiving
Judgers usually make decisions by considering what is considered fair or conventional, take the time to find the best solution to a problem, have a specific goal in mind, decide when it is appropriate to revisit the issue, and avoid talking about conflict once it has been resolved.
People who are more likely to Perceive use facts and check assumptions to ensure harmony. They also exercise negotiation, actively listen, and take breaks as needed. -Additionally, they may seek out mediators to help resolve conflicts.
FPs will likely approach a Compromising conflict management style.
If you are patient and take the time to listen to others, you will most likely prefer a compromising style. The advantages of this approach are that it allows for a faster solution than trying to come to a win-win, it can provide a temporary fix until a better solution is found, and it can help reduce stress between parties as everyone has a say in the final outcome. However, there are some disadvantages to this style as well, such as the potential for a lose-lose situation if everyone is only partially pleased, it may not build mutual trust, and it could require revisiting the issue at a later date.
Use this conflict management style as a temporary fix only when time is of the essence on difficult decisions. If not everyone is pleased with the solution, the issue should be reopened later so that it can be further discussed.
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